I am lucky.. I have been blessed with 2 beautiful children, and I have a lovely little house, and a wonderful partner who does everything for us. In May 2015 I met my partner, on a whim, after talking for hours online about cars, ice cream, and sporks. We chatted and nattered about all sorts of rubbish until the early hours, and eventually arranged to meet one night when Son stayed at my mums. He picked me up in his car, and he started to drive. We ended up at a pub, where we sat in the beer garden with a soft drink (I don’t drink and he was driving) and we were talking and talking, learning more and more about each other. Although there was no intention on love or getting together at this point, I opened up to hi about my anxiety, eaing disorder, and obsessive compulsive disorder.. and he explained his dreams and desires for the future. There was no awkwardness or awkward silences, the conversation was flowing nicely. We then got back into the car as it was getting quite late, and the decided f*ck it, lets go to the seaside. So that’s exactly what we did. By the time we got there it was coming up to 11pm. Very cold and very dark. We walked along the pitch black and freezing beach, with his arms around me, laughing and talking sh*t as usual.When we got back onto the promenade, we sat down, cuddled and shared our first kiss. Which was so strange because both of us did not plan it, it was completely out of the blue. Perfect. Ever since then, we have been inseperable, and less than one year later (7 months to be precise) I fell pregnant with our daughter. We decided to have a baby in October and by December, I was pregnant.

I couldn’t be happier.

When We decided to start trying for a baby, Partner had just got a job with the Ambulance service, I was at college, we knew it was going to be tough, but its just something we wanted to do. Ever since, he has absolutely worked his bum off for us. Son incuded. (Hes an amazing stepdad) Son never ever goes without anything, when he needs new shoes, clothes, food, days out, birthday presents, Christmas presents, Partner has it covered. Although hes not Sons Dad, he does everything for him as if he were.
Although hes amazing, hard working and will do anything in his power for us, it does make me feel sad that hes always always working. He has 2 jobs, if hes not doing overtime with one, hes delivering organs to far away hopitals with another. I don’t think he knows how grateful I am that he does all this work for us while I’m at home looking after the children. Looking at it materialisticly (is that even a word?) the money is good, and obviously we would struggle a LOT without the wage he brings home, and I’m very grateful that he has such a good job that he enjoys so much, saves people lives and is well paid too. But at the same time, I wish he wouldn’t put so much pressure on himself to work so much. Id much rather he be home with us, making memories and doing activities with Son than out working all the time because he feels he needs to. Some months (especially coming upto Christmas) the overtime is good, as its getting colder, we are using more heating, Christmas presents, Christmas parties, coats and warm clothes for the kids, so yeah he money is good. But there are luxuries we can go without so he dosent feel so pressured to work so much, so we can have more weekend nights in with a film and nice dinner, or we can go for long wintery walks with the kids getting all wrapped up and coming home having hot chocolate and watch a good film in our pyjamas. Rather than “oh we are going to have to cancel our plans today, I’m gonna go drive down south to deliver a kidney for transplant, but its okay, its an extra £x.xx for so and so”

But id rather you be here, with us. Not working 50+ hours a week including weekends. Money comes and goes, theres always gonna be more opportunities to earn more money. But when memories are missed, theres no opportunity to get them again, they don’t come back!

So next time you turn something down or cancel plans with family and friends because theres an opportunity to work (obviously within reason) think about what your gonna be missing out on, and think… is the extra money really gonna be worth it in the long run?

That’s my opinion anyway, is 20 hours overtime a week better than ,say, 10 hours overtime and 10 hours extra at home with your family?
I know what id choose anyway.

ex oh ex oh,

Whitters x

 

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